Sometimes you have to be strong for yourself.

"Sometimes you have to be strong for yourself. You have to know that you are a good person and a good friend. What is meant to be, will end up good; what is not, won't. Relationships are worth fighting for, but sometimes you can't be the only one fighting. At times, people need to fight for you. If they don't, you must just move on and realize what you gave them was more than they were willing to give you. Hopefully, people realize great things when they come around and don't lose something real. Always fight, until you can't anymore, and then be fought for."

Wow I wish I could give credit to who ever wrote that. This is something I need to staple to my soul! How is it when we are in the middle of the relationship we never see these incites? I know I have hung on too long, been the only one fighting, and the one hoping futility they would fight for me when when i finally gave up.  I also know now looking back at those relationships i can see why they were not meant to be for a variety of reasons. The question i have is, how do you know when you have fought long enough or hard enough? for me i always think saying this one more thing will have that light bulb turning on in their head or heart and they will suddenly see our potential for greatness together or finally see me as this person they cannot live without. funny now even as i write this i can laugh at myself and say..what was i thinking? And there is the answer...I wasn't thinking, i was feeling, blind to the fact that had it been "good" i would not have been the only one fighting to make it work.

How much easier would it be to move on if we could adopt sooner in the relationship the attitude of  "what was meant to be, will end up good; what is not, won't". I mean some of us out there stay even when the relationship becomes verbally or physically abusive and that is surely a "won't end up good" situation. Is there a way to separate our thinking heart from our feeling heart to see sooner what will end up good and what will not? i think as we have more relationships under out belt and narrow our playing field we can. But there is always that heart factor that can throw the best laid plans out the window.

So how do we stay committed to ourselves, fight for what we want, but know when we have reached our capacity to give more? I think for me, i most often have hung on too long, but that said, I can look back at every relationship and remember the exact moment that i knew i was done fighting and had given all that i was willing to give. I could walk away with no regrets...

I know for each of us there is someone out there that will see the greatness we can have with them in a relationship and fight for us. The challenge is, we always want it now....so mister right now becomes our project to make the right one. This is the cycle we need to stop and why we need to start being stronger for our selves!!!